Lately I've been feeling a balancing act of emotions. Similar to walking on a tight rope, spinning glass plates. There is something always on my mind that I have to balance with everything else. For example, Scott's memory and knowing that he's gone, with knowing I need to function at work. It's really hard. Balancing grief and life is very, very challenging. How do you get good at it?
I tell myself that I need to focus on what I can focus on and that's it. I cannot predict the future. I can only live in the "now." This is what I must focus on. Each day at at a time. I think I'm finally at the point where I am living "day by day." Before it felt more like hour by hour, but today I know I'm healing. Healing the way I should be healing, and also living my life.
I still cannot answer the question "what would Scott want you to do."